Single and loving it?

Discussion in Off Topic Discussion & General Questions started by Nikkishea21 • Dec 15, 2014.

  1. Nikkishea21

    Nikkishea21Member

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    Being single is a state that we find ourselves in for more reasons that one and at times we contemplate as to whether or not we are better off that way. This is further compounded if we are surrounded by friends who are married or involved in relationships and they go on and on about their latest escapades in love.

    Do you feel sorry for yourself being in this state or are you comfortable in your present situation?
     
  2. xTinx

    xTinxWell-Known Member

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    I'm currently comfortable being single. Not that I'm averse to the idea of dating someone, so while no one's trying to get me off the market yet, I'll rejoice in my single blessedness. Someone special and marriage will come at its own time and pace. The more you chase after these things, the more they evade you.
     
  3. ExpertAdvice

    ExpertAdviceActive Member

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    I don't believe people really think that being single is better than having a sensible loving companion, the fact is, people aren't meant to be alone. People need to have companions,a person that is single will further feel the need to have a companion because they see their friends with spouses, which clearly underscores the point that people need companionship. The true fact of the matter is that everyone needs love, those who pretend to, are sad, and those who lie to themselves to say that they are okay by themselves; they are more often than not selfish or cruel people..Humans need love.
     
  4. LitoLawless

    LitoLawlessActive Member

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    I've been single for about two years now and I think I'm OK. I go on dates and meet people all the time but things don't seem to work out. I would love a girlfriend, and I know that I will find one eventually. Being single has really helped me find out a lot about myself as a person. It has also help me put a lot of things in my life into some sort of perspective. I think time alone and being single is just as important as being in a relationship. It's like Yin and Yang.
     
  5. Theo

    TheoWell-Known Member

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    Some people are single by choice, because it's better than compromising your life to be with someone else. I have friends who do compromise, so they don't live life to the full. They can't do certain things or go to places without considering someone else and that's fine if that's what you want, but I don't right now.

    Being single isn't the stigma it was and I have left relationships to be single because I was no longer 'me' and if a relationship takes part of you away, you are better off alone.
     
  6. Mockingbird

    MockingbirdActive Member

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    I have been single since 1998 and I can tell you it is not for everyone, but it works for me. Before that I was married 10 years. I date, I go do things with friends and I have a very active life. There are times I miss having someone to snuggle up to, but when I am being honest with myself I feel like I may never be able to re-adjust to having someone in my home all the time. See I am fussy and I like things a certain way. I don't want to have to argue about how the towels should be folded or whether or not dinner gets cooked that night. Like I said not for everyone.
     
  7. Lushlala

    LushlalaWell-Known Member

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    Before I got married, I'd go for long spells of being single, and actually loved it. Only the people around me would express their concern, they seemed more bothered than me. I don't think marriage is for everybody, some people like their solitude and I wouldn't feel sorry for them unless they said they were unhappy. I never thought I'd get married, and it's not something I sought. Had my husband not come along, I would've been happy going about my business single, footloose and fancy free. I also like my things a certain way, and hate a messy house. Luckily, my husband and I are on the same wavelength on most things :)
     
  8. wulfman

    wulfmanActive Member

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    There are advantages and disadvantages to both. I am married now and like it better than when I was single. But when I was single that independence and being able to do what I wanted when was something I liked. Marriage gave me a routine structured life though which in the long run was healthier. The house is kept in shape, you are more hygienic , you eat 10x better and just the warmth and caring of another human being.
     
  9. Onionman

    OnionmanActive Member

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    I was perpetually single for a long time. And without doubt it was a state of mind. I'd like to think that I don't have two heads and had females interested in me (in fact, there were girls interested in me). But for so long I wasn't attracting the right type or trying to attract the right type. But I decided one day things had to change. And since that point I've been in a relationship for a number of years. So much of it was in the mind, without a doubt.
     
  10. ACSAPA

    ACSAPAWell-Known Member

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    I was in a relationship for over 10 years with my daughter's father and I've been single for the last few years. I definitely prefer being single. My ex was so pushy that I didn't feel like I had enough freedom. Just making my own choices every day without being lectured or arguing is great. Being single as a mother is risky financially but still worth it.
     
  11. Theo

    TheoWell-Known Member

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    I have many friends who have 'settled' and some have now left their partners as they realize it wasn't worth it. Many have had to go back to work, but are happier and also have found new relationships.

    It's brave to leave a relationship as some friends won't leave and remain unhappy and miserable because they are afraid to be single again. You have to look at life and if you have no control, you're not really living are you?
     
  12. ChanellG

    ChanellGActive Member

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    You should never feel sorry for yourself at any time for any reason. It serves absolutely no purpose and doesn't help you change or improve your situation in any way. There are a number of benefits to being single, just as there are a number of benefits to having a romantic companion. It's all about where you are in your life and what your needs are. Sometimes relationships are an asset and sometimes they are a distraction.
     
  13. JosieP

    JosiePWell-Known Member

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    I chose to be single for quite a while and had just decided to settle down when I met my husband. At first, I wasn't so sure about being in a relationship, because being single is definitely so much easier. Or rather, it was. Once we really got to know each other and gelled to work together as a team, we became completely perfect for each other and life is definitely preferable together. Both ways of life are what you make them.. completely. I was happy to be single because I chose to be and I made it work for me. I learned everything about myself and enjoyed every minute. Life with my husband is the same though.. only now I can add so much more to the benefits :)