Do You Hoard Or Know A Hoarder?

Discussion in Off Topic Discussion & General Questions started by ACSAPA • Apr 27, 2014.

  1. ACSAPA

    ACSAPAWell-Known Member

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    I've had my life affected by hoarders a couple of times. My ex mother-in-law was such a hoarder that she once donated my old computer, printer and speakers that I was storing in a closet, so that she could make room for her yard sale finds. I could have sold all that computer stuff, but it was urgent that she make room for a dusty box of yard sale dolls, without asking whether it was okay to donate my stuff. I thought it was weird that she placed so much value on junk items. She kept a box of plastic drinking straws for 15 years and when she went into a nursing home, my ex had a lot of empty takeout containers and dirty skeins of yarn to throw out.

    Now I have a friend who wanted me to sell her vintage stuff on eBay, but she's been frozen with fear for two months and unable to sort through two houses full of stuff and an additional storage shed.
    So I'm indirectly being affected, because if I was selling that stuff, I would be getting a cut, but since she can't get motivated to throw a few things into a box, this project is being delayed indefinitely.

    When I wanted to move really badly, I sold almost everything I owned, so that my daughter and I could have a nice place to live. I did it, and I got over losing my stuff.

    What happens to people that makes them value boxes of stuff they never use over money and progress? If I had two houses full of stuff like my friend, I would be listing stuff nonstop and making money towards life goals.

    Why do people find it so hard to let go of things that they don't even look at?
     
  2. Nickchick

    NickchickWell-Known Member

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    I don't know. I've dealt with a terrible mess all my life. When the social worker came by, she said my mom is definitely a hoarder. I've tried to be patient with her which is really difficult when you have no patience but it seems like too slow of a process. She has ADD though so that's why she would buy things. I know she has been making progress but it seems like she'll never have time to get it all done and it doesn't help me because my room is a mess as I'm sure I learned to be cluttered from her.
     
  3. LindaKay

    LindaKayActive Member

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    I'm not a hoarder. I'm definitely not a minimalist who throws EVERYTHING away, but our clutter is pretty limited. If I have "stuff" that I'm not sure if I want to keep, I put it in the closet in my office -- it's a spare room with a huge walk-in closet, so there is no shortage of space. Anyway, if I don't do anything with it for two or three months, I eventually get irritated that it's in there (even though I don't go in there for any other purpose right now), and I go through it and toss a lot of stuff. It has worked really well for controlling clutter.
     
  4. jneanz

    jneanzActive Member

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    My grandmother is a hoarder and she will near shoot someone who wants to clean her home (no cable TV show for her :D). To laugh about it is the best way to get past it. One reason that she hoards is that she grew up having nothing. Some things have value but the majority are bric-a-brac.
     
  5. Happyflowerlady

    HappyflowerladyWell-Known Member

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    My parents saved everything , too, and I pretty much grew up that way. If you are saving useful things that can later be used, that is one thing; but when you have miscellaneous left over containers that you will never re-use, then it is time to start going through stuff and get back down to a manageable amount. I am not a minimalist by any means, but I do go through things and weed out what i don't need, and then I give it to someone that can use it, so it is not just wasted.
     
  6. J3NN4

    J3NN4Member

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    My grandmother used to be, but my uncle has since moved in to help take care of her and it's curbed her hoarding a lot. I think it mostly came from her growing up poor, and she became very protective of her money and didn't like to waste anything.

    A few years ago, she had to stay in a nursing home for a while. Family got together to clean her house and we filled up three trash bins with trash, expired food, plastic containers, etc. I don't mean regular trash cans or the kind you see sitting out on the curb. I mean the giant bins that they load onto the bed of a trash-truck and haul away. It was so sad.

    It was even worse when she got home and watching her have a melt-down over her stuff being gone, but it was really unhealthy how she was living, and she wasn't able to get around her house because of it.

    It seems to be a common thing with seniors, especially the buying stuff from TV ads or making "donations" to those random charities that get sent through the mail. No clue how much money she spent on things like that, hoping they'd send her a "free" umbrella or tote bag. She had so many of them.
     
  7. deathbyprayer

    deathbyprayerActive Member

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    I think I have a mild hoarding problem, especially when it comes to broken electronic devices. I often stash broken earphones and chargers and eventually try to fix them or just rummage for usable parts. But my mom probably has, she doesn't want to throw away clothes that are basically rotting in her closet, she always keep empty shampoo bottles and God knows what else in the basement. But I'm glad that she's not one those hoarders that keep disgusting things in their house.
     
  8. Pat

    PatWell-Known Member

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    I am a pack rat, I do tend to save alot of stuff but do not consider myself a hoarder. I throw trash away and give stuff to the Goodwill of things I do not use any more. I have seen some of the shows of people that hoard for years and it is frightening. I do not see how a person can step over dirty dishes with old dried up food on them for days.
     
  9. isabbbela

    isabbbelaWell-Known Member

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    I don't hoard,I don't even have a lot of stuff in my house since I don't have that much money to buy them, however I have an aunt that hoards a lot. She has a 3 bedroom apartment and one of the bedrooms is so full of stuff you cannot even open the door. And that's a big bedroom actually! I always tell her to get rid of stuff but she can't, she just accumulates more which doesn't even seem possible. It's kind of scary.
     
  10. LindaKay

    LindaKayActive Member

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    That sounds frightening. I can't imagine having so much stuff that I couldn't get around my house. Everything isn't neat, tidy and organized ALL the time, but you can at least get around. And I can have the house quick-company-ready in 15 minutes and fully ready for company in about 45 minutes at all times. I can't imagine living like a hoarder and being embarrassed to have people over or just being miserable in your own home.
     
  11. CrystalMarie

    CrystalMarieActive Member

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    I am not a hoarder but I know some. I think my parents are in the beggining stages of hoarding. I have tried to tell them but they honestly think I am joking because they have not reached that stage of those hoarders that they show on television. Mother keeps old papers and bills that she does not need. It is getting so bad that there are piles on envelops on the living room tables. The house is clean and livable but I do not understand why they have to keep old papers. The moment I knew it was going to get bad is when I seen them all over the living room table. My mother use to argue about the tables staying clear. We will see I guess.
     
  12. Nickchick

    NickchickWell-Known Member

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    So basically your mother is my mother's twin? Well my mom would be willing to get rid of her paperwork in the drawer if someone advised her to but she just doesn't know what she should keep. She does however refuse to get rid of receipts even though they are old and does keep a lot of papers in general. Yeah she said about the table too except in her case it is the kitchen table. She said she wanted to keep it clear but yet the table has a bunch of stuff on it.
     
  13. alexiskilgannon

    alexiskilgannonMember

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    I am not a hoarder, but I recently came into contact with my first hoarder. My friend's wedding was about a week ago and the wedding took place at her mother-in-law's house, who was absolutely crazy to say the least. Not only was she crazy, but my friend had told me that I could get ready in her mother-in-laws room and it was something out of the television show "Hoarders." I couldn't believe the mess and piles upon piles of trash and infomercial products. I had never seen anything like it in my life.
     
  14. True2marie

    True2marieActive Member

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    Fortunately, I am NOT a hoarder. However, I do know one. In her case, she hoards animals. Sadly, this person has over 50 birds ALONG WITH cats, dogs, and lizards. I truly feel sorry for her pets because I am sure they don't get enough TLC.
     
  15. ACSAPA

    ACSAPAWell-Known Member

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    It's not that bad that you keep broken earphones. There are a ton of tutorials on the internet on how to fix broken earphones where the sound has gone out in one ear. I'm planning to fix a couple of my daughter's pairs of headphones so she can use them again.
     
  16. Sunshine

    SunshineActive Member

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    My mom was a hoarder and still sort of is. When we had a huge house it was packed to the brim with all sorts of stuff. Every size and shape box possible, plastic bags, books, national geographics, bottles, jars, etc., etc. She wouldn't throw anything out because she felt there was a possible use for everything. She was crafty so yes once in a while things did come in useful, but it was so much JUNK. The house never looked crazy like the hoarders show, but every bit of was packed to the brim with "useful" things.
     
  17. Onionman

    OnionmanActive Member

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    Maybe not on an extreme level, but my mother is definitely a hoarder. She's very good at keeping things given to her and choosing to use them when the time is right. The trouble is a lot of time the thing in question goes out of fashion or out of date. She keeps a few massive trunks which she puts things in. There are things in those trunks that have been there for decades, waiting for the right time to be used...
     
  18. Mockingbird

    MockingbirdActive Member

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    My son's girlfriends mother is a hoarder. My son was telling me that the brothers decided to clean their room and made three big bags of garbage. The mom became so upset she went out and dug through all the bags bringing back in two bags worth of junk. Things these kids could never use. My son told me that there are totes and bags of stuff packed to the ceiling. It is worse because the family has several pet cats that have managed to urinate on these totes and boxes so they are probably ruined. The kids want to get a dumpster and throw this stuff away when the mom goes out of town.

    I talked to my sons girl friend about this and she said that the things in the totes are clothes and stuff that were not even theirs. Some of this stuff is hand me downs from cousins and other family members from years ago. The mom seems to equate the things with the actual person, in her mind she is throwing the person away if she throws the things away. It is very sad because it effects the entire families life.
     
  19. DrRipley

    DrRipleyExpert

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    I hoard digital content. Ever since I was young, I almost always have hoarded music and video files, but thankfully I'm not too obsessive about it as I've already lost so many of those files with each computer that ended up dying on me. Although for some reason I keep on doing it even as I get new ones, knowing that I'll probably just lose the files someday when my computer accidentally breaks again.
     
  20. Nickchick

    NickchickWell-Known Member

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    Yeah I guess I kinda hoard that too, mostly pictures that I find off the internet but I try not to keep too many. I'm especially keen on keeping it if it's an animation.