What If I Don't Like My Children?

I don't have children myself but i think by default, mothers will love their child fiercely the moment they lay their eyes on them. That's what i heard at least but it does make sense, i can't picture it any other way. I have a nephew and i love him to death and i can imagine myself loving my own child as well, even in thoughts, i know they will be my everything. Maybe you're simply not ready for kids so you have these thoughts in your head, you don't have to pressure yourself, when you're ready, you're ready.

 

How old are your children in the first place? It depends on that. For example, I'm 21. But parents are in their early 50s. Sometimes they are mean to me. They don't like some elements of my style and some of my views on life in general. However, they've learned to respect that. It took them some time but they eventually did it and I'm happy about that.

It would be too boring If your child was the exact copy of you in the past. Moreover, it's just a wrong thing. Just my humble opinion.

 

I agree with oblivious me, it's just a mothers instinct to love your children more than you've loved anything in your life. Every mom says that, but you can't fully understand it until you have kids of your own. If your kids come out of the womb and you think "Wow, I can't love this."..then, I really feel that's a mental health issue almost. But, it's normal to fear things like that beforehand. Some people may not be kid people, until they have kids of their own. And as far as postpartum goes, I really don't think that boils down to hating your kids. To me, postpartum is being so overwhelmed and not being able to take care of your own needs. And maybe you grow to resent your kids a little bit when you suffer from pp, but I don't think that would grow into hate and you would still love them. Plus, I think it's normal to think "Wow, you are such a little shit!" from time to time when your kids do bad things or whatever, but that's a small passing feeling, it's normal for them to act up and normal for you to get irritated with them at times. I've even known several people that have repeatedly said "I hate kids, nothing will change that and I'm never having any of my own. It's just not for me." and then have gone to have kids of their own and absolutely adore it. Or even not have kids, but are super attached to my kid and loves her to death. So, just remember fears like that are normal! And sometimes it's just our own insecurites, thinking we won't be good moms. I'm a mother and I still feel like I'm not good enough for my daughter. It's natural.

 

If we were to go by how most people parent, I'd say a LOT of people don't like their kids. lol. But they do love them.. a mother's instinct is to love and protect her child even before it's born. And, as in your case, before it's even conceived.. you're already worried about them; you're already a mother, you just haven't met them yet

 

I don't have kids, so I can't speak from a personal standpoint. But from what I understand, a mother instinctively loves her children, it's just a natural thing that happens without a mother even thinking about it. But in terms of liking? Hehe I don't think that's a guarantee LOL I mean, there are even married couples out there who love each other and don't necessarily like each other. I know I have family members who I love but don't actually like very much.

 

That is impossible. Every mom loves their child.

 

To be frank, there will be times you may not like your children. Sometimes they are too demanding or perhaps you are going through a stressful period. Know this going into being a parent. It happens. What also happens is that you end up loving them again.