Many people know that I'm a very compassionate person and love to help the poor. But there are some people who take advantage of this. The more you help them, the more they keep coming back to you for help. It's a situation where I can't refuse, because she is my neighbor. Have you been in my shoes and how did you handle such a situation?
There are a lot of people like this on our place. Once they have tried asking for help from me, they always ask for it. We had two neighbors who are like that, consistently asking for money with promises that they would pay. At first I helped them since it wasn't a big deal and I really do love helping. But I realized they already owe me a lot. So there was this one time that they cam to ask some money so they can pay their bills. I just told them that I would really love to help them out, but what money can I lend them? They weren't paying what they owed me, I told them that all I have is my grocery money and if I lend that to you, I won't eat. and I just told them I can lend them money again if they would pay me what they owe me since that money is my emergency fund.
It has also happened to me. I have a friend who has been borrowing me money since last year. I have never said no because we would agree she will return it after she gets more. Only months later did I realize that she doesn't borrow because she needs it but because she knows I won't refuse. I decided to keep my distance and add some boundaries.
A year ago I had a room mate who also happens to be my co-worker, and this guy always borrows some money to me. He always promises to pay me when his paycheck arrives and yet when the time comes he just use alibi so that he can extend payment time. To cut the story short, he never did pay me. Anyways I stay on a different apartment now.
I've had this happen to me a few times but I eventually got tired of it and told them how I was feeling about it. I was very surprised that they took it well as they realized that they were just taking advantage of my kindness. I mean one can be nice but sometimes we can exaggerae just a bit too much. I then found out that they were doing it to save money themselves leaving me to pay for more gas.
Yes there are many people who don't think nothing of taking advantage of others. It has happened to me over the years and I have seen it happen to my sister. My personal philosophy is to never loan money to people even if I have it and especially to friends because they will usually not pay it back and it isn't as though I don't ever need it again. My sister worked with a girl who uses people to babysit because she can't afford daycare. My sister was nice enough to do it for her and she didn't even offer to pay her. Since she had to go pick the baby up and take her back to her friend because she doesn't have a car. I babysat once as well and she did pay me but it was only enough to cover gas. I don't mind doing favors for people once in a while but now every time she can't find any of her other friends then she texts us to see what we are doing. I can't imagine just giving my child to just anyone to ride in their car and to watch them.
Yep it's happened to me and with disastrous consequences. I met a woman at my granddaughter's school who had a child around the same age as her. She seemed nice and we became friends. After a while she began asking if I could lend her money. It would always be because she had no electricity or food and was desperate to keep the children warm or feed them. It tugged on my heartstrings because I worried about her children. As time went on I could see she had a drink problem and began to realise that I was funding her drink habit rather than saving her children so I then said I didn't have the money. She fell out with me over it and eventually her children were put in foster care. I feel bad that I was giving her money to buy drink although I didn't know at the time.
When I was younger, I was overly generous when it comes to charitable alms but when i realized the scams, I am now discerning. Just a few weeks ago, there was this guy seeking for donations to his church. He handed me a letter supposedly signed by the parish priest. But the church is located in the other town. Hey, why ask donations here? I pointed to him that our town’s church is just in the other block and I even pointed the church’s belfry to drive home my point. He went away without saying anything.
I have this friend that always takes advantage of my hospitality. We are mates, when she's over at my place I cook for her and cater for her all of the time but whenever I'm at her place, it is still the same thing, I would always be the one doing cleaning and cooking else we would have nothing to eat. I noticed, got fed up and changed. Whenever she came around, she would ask for food and I would just play dumb or I'll ask her to cook and then she'll say she's not so hungry. Lol
