Insecure nature? or just blatant immaturity?

Discussion in Misc & Others started by ExpertAdvice • Sep 29, 2014.

  1. ExpertAdvice

    ExpertAdviceActive Member

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    What do you all think of people, in particular, spouses of people, who search the phones and Facebook accounts, Skype accounts and Emails of the other spouse-without reason? Do you think that a person who does this can change for the better and stop or not? What do you think is the reason for this kind of behavior? and have you been exposed to such behavior?
    For those of us who have experienced such a situation, or those who are still experiencing such situations, who do you deal with it? Thanks for all your responses guys!:cool:
     
  2. Dora M

    Dora MWell-Known Member

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    I can't say that I have come across this kind of behavior. My partner and I, we both have fb accounts, but it has never occurred to me to spy into his affairs. As a matter of fact, I am so disinterested that I don't even know what he has been posting in recent months. He has friends with whom he shares some special interests, and I respect his privacy.
    I think that snooping around in your partner's accounts is rather low. Why not talk directly to him or her?
     
  3. JosieP

    JosiePWell-Known Member

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    It's either insecurity, curiosity or the other person is giving reason to question their loyalties. Either way, I don't think the snooper should be in a relationship. They clearly have things to work out first and bringing insecurity to the table isn't fair to the other person at all. If there are reasons to believe the spouse is cheating, there are other ways to go about it. I would never in a million years cheat on my husband, but I still expect a level of privacy. I have nothing to hide, but I hide it lol... thankfully he's mature and knows I would never hurt him. He doesn't think twice about my accounts online.

    Oh and yes, I do believe anyone can change anything about them. I think it's far harder to change when you're still in the relationship the bad habits were formed, but I'm sure it's still possible.
     
  4. Strykstar

    StrykstarActive Member

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    I personally don't do this myself as I see it as a breach of confidence and lack of trust, I don't think I could be in a relationship with someone with these habits either.
    I think people who are paranoid about their partner cheating on them are more likely to cheat on their partners as well, if you don't even think about that stuff and completely trust your companion, then cheating won't even cross your mind.
     
  5. DrRipley

    DrRipleyExpert

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    I think both can be blamed for behavior like this. Sometimes the mistrust is warranted because there is reason to be suspicious and sometimes, it's just insecurities or trust issues boiling up to the surface even if the spouse is very trustworthy. At the end of the day, it takes two level headed people to make a relationship work, because it really is a lot of work and levelheaded ness needed to keep a relationship afloat and thriving for decades, especially once kids are involved wherein people can easily lose control.
     
  6. ACSAPA

    ACSAPAWell-Known Member

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    I don't personally know anyone who does this, but I've heard of people doing it. If I was dating someone and they started spying on me online, I would have to break up with them because it's an invasion of privacy and there's the implied insult of them not trusting me.
     
  7. etc

    etcActive Member

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    me and my partner share devices every now and then from tablets to desktop. why don't you just share your logins instead so yiu won't see it as spying after all you're not stranger to each.

    partners who does spy i think has reasons to, if you have done things before then trust may just be an issue.