Living with a smoker

Discussion in Health & Beauty started by Dora M • Aug 7, 2014.

  1. Dora M

    Dora MWell-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2014
    Threads:
    164
    Messages:
    1,811
    Likes Received:
    139
    Due to some extenuating circumstances, I am forced to share a place with a smoker at the moment. My previous flatmate had some emergency and needed to go away for a while. She sublet Her Room to another girl, my current flatmate, who thinks that she has a right to smoke in the flat, as we both pay the same amount of rent and have "equal rights". I don't see why she can't smoke outside on the balcony.
    Even though I used to be a smoker myself once, I now really can't stand the smell of cigarettes. Our apartment is beginning to smell bad. How can I change her mind? I don't like threatening her. I need a better solution.
     
  2. May102014

    May102014Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2014
    Threads:
    37
    Messages:
    542
    Likes Received:
    38
    Whoa. I hate the smell of cigarettes. I think you should tell her the truth about how the smoking bothers you. It won't hurt her to smoke on the balcony. I understand she is paying the same amount of rent but there is something call respect for other people and the apartment in general. I don't want to walk into a home and it reeks of cigarette smoke. My advice is tell her the truth and if she is still defiant, try to see if the option of finding another roommate to take her place is available. I hope you won't have to be the one to leave if she stays and continue this habit.
     
  3. prettycolors

    prettycolorsActive Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2014
    Threads:
    109
    Messages:
    731
    Likes Received:
    17
    May102014 is right - tell her how you feel and see how she reacts. Cigarette smoke is dangerous even for a non smoker so even is she pays the same amount as you she has no full right to smoke in the house. If her reaction is negative and the indoor smoking continues try to find another flatmate. Because just think, once winter comes getting the smell of smoke out is even harder since you can't let the windows open all day long.
     
  4. Dora M

    Dora MWell-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2014
    Threads:
    164
    Messages:
    1,811
    Likes Received:
    139
    Thanks for your thoughts, I already told her in the very beginning, but my words fell on deaf ears. So, unfortunately, I now have to employ a different tactic and draw a finishing line under this issue that is starting to stress me. The only solution is that either she or I move out of the flat, since she can't be persuaded to respect our communal space.
     
  5. allswl

    allswlActive Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2012
    Threads:
    7
    Messages:
    140
    Likes Received:
    9
    She does not have the right to prevent you from enjoying the flat, which is what she is doing by smoking, even though she shares the rent. I believe that when reasoning fails you have to take the bull by the horn. Since it was your friend who got her, get your friend to tell her that if she does not stop smoking in the flat, she will have to leave.
     
  6. ACSAPA

    ACSAPAWell-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2012
    Threads:
    52
    Messages:
    3,093
    Likes Received:
    240
    Is she actually on the lease? If you are on the lease and she is not, then she does NOT have the same rights as you because you are recognized by the landlord as a tenant and she is not.
    If you decide to tough it out with her, there are things you can do to make her presence suck less, like buying an air purifier or getting houseplants to purify the air.
    You can also buy some carpet and room deodorizer to mitigate the stench.
     
  7. Pat

    PatWell-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2012
    Threads:
    66
    Messages:
    2,725
    Likes Received:
    328
    If her name is not on the lease as stated above she does not have equal rights as you in the flat. If you do not feel like a big fight just get a air cleaner and run it to help keep the smoke smell out of your clothes and the apartment.