That Old Thing....has Come Back

Discussion in Off Topic Discussion & General Questions started by jneanz • May 17, 2015.

?

Would you go back to an ex if it seemed they had changed?

  1. Yes, everyone deserves a chance and you never know what the future may hold.

    1 vote(s)
    33.3%
  2. Maybe, it depends on what changes have been made and whether it's a front.

    1 vote(s)
    33.3%
  3. Heck no! These things are history for a reason...move on to the next one!

    1 vote(s)
    33.3%
  1. jneanz

    jneanzActive Member

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    That old thing is my ex-fiancee. We were together for many years and things were pretty tumultuous. To a degree, I accepted this until I got sick and had to move back home. He kept in touch with well wishes but I was determined to move on with school and getting my life back on track.
    Well, I'm getting my degree in a few weeks and he not only wishes me well but wants to be a part of my future. At first I laughed until I wet my pants but a talk we had said it was no joke on his part.
    As I'm getting older, I fear dying alone but at the same time, I don't want to age before my time dealing with drama. If I were to go into great detail, I would be writing all day about things I had to deal with in 10+ years. However, I debating between saying "No thanks" and just taking it slow. Thoughts?
     
  2. Theo

    TheoWell-Known Member

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    It depends on what you want. You can take it slowly and then say it's not right for you or you can no now and then wonder whether you should have given him a chance.

    You shouldn't go back for fear of being alone though, maybe be friends and see if a spark is still there as sometimes it fizzles out and a friendship remains. Remember, you are in control though and go with how you feel is right for you now in the present.
     
  3. MrsJones

    MrsJonesActive Member

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    If there is no love between the two of you (not a one-sided relationship) then I say no. Remain friends.
     
  4. jneanz

    jneanzActive Member

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    Update: We went out over the holidays. I can honestly say that I'm glad there was only talking and nothing else. However, those talks revealed some pretty scary things like his desire to have a joint bank account (he's had gambling issues), to marry before the year is out and for me to move in quickly.

    I also get a feeling that he has some unresolved business elsewhere but I'm going to concentrate on the last part of my degree. In the meantime, my cougar crush has expressed interest in attending my graduation. YAY!:D
     
  5. radzi

    radziActive Member

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    I think this is a really interesting topic. I think that if I loved my "ex", which I've never had an ex in my life because my girlfriend has always been mine and always will be, but anyway, If I did love my "ex" I would forgive her if she did whatever and not hold it against her if she has changed. It depends on what she has done because if it does not give me security how will I live in peace?
     
  6. jneanz

    jneanzActive Member

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    I don't how old you are but consider yourself lucky if you found only one person to love in your lifetime!
     
  7. radzi

    radziActive Member

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    Thank you. Not only have I found one person to love in my lifetime, that person also had me the first, and I will be the only and she will be the only. It's guaranteed and it's been for years already and it's going great and we are very close like best friends, we always love each other and if anything happens, there's always the concept of forgiveness in our relationship. Me and her are secure.
     
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