Who does the washing up during the holidays? Personally even if I am a guest I like to help clear at least, but the ones who didn't cook should wash and clear up, shouldn't they? One Thanksgiving I was put on the list to do the washing up (KP) as I didn't have family with me and all the others were let off because they had family and were leaving soon. (I was in a residential retreat) But it was unfair as it was only two of us for over 100 people, so others did help out and then left. I do think if you enjoy the food, everyone should help out with the clearing too.
It's not unfair, you could have left too! Honestly, it's only dishes and it's only a nuisance to do if you think it is. I've washed dishes all my life, including the times when I had to wash all the dishes for holiday parties and banquets my family and friends do yearly, and it's no hassle to me - it's quite relaxing and meditative in my opinion. I don't know if you've seen unwashed dishes left in the sink for months, but I've seen it a few times, and it is not healthy at all, which urged me to do the darn dishes myself!
Maybe you didn't read my post, I was living there so i couldn't leave and it was for 100 people, all their dishes and also the pots and pans all the chefs used while everyone sat and drank. It took us a couple of hours as there were about 8 volunteers and the person in charge gave her favorites the night off. I was not one of them! Perhaps you don't mind, but I do believe in fairness and equality. It's not the physical work, but how people should behave.
I see where you're coming from! I have a large family, mostly women. Whenever we have a family get-together like at Christmas, we all pitch in in whatever little way we can. It's a very long standing unwritten "law" that we have; whoever cooks doesn't have to get involved in the cleaning up. The good thing is we all have preferences and pet hates, so it always works out Eh, I'm afraid I find it rude for people to stuff their faces to bursting then take themselves away without offering to help with the tidying up. As a guest, I always offer to help; then it's for the host to politely decline or accept. It's called manners and good etiquette, sadly some people are not that way inclined
I help to clear up the place and get rid of the trash, since I'm not fond of washing the dishes. I think if everyone just contributes a little bit the after party mess gets cleared up really quickly!
We have a rule at our house that if you cooked dinner, you didn't have to do the dishes. It's been like that forever and it's always been fair, but like you I always do the dishes when I'm a guest at someone's place. It's only the right thing to do especially since they fed me and invited me over, you know?
Everyone in the family washes the dishes. Whoever is free or is suddenly overcome by the spirit of volunteerism, he or she does the washing or clearing up. At times, it's a team effort. Like when I start washing the dishes, my mom or my brother volunteers to wipe the table clean. My dad then gathers the leftover and feed it to the dogs or to any pet that wants it.
I do help with the dishes during the holidays. I also set up the table if I'm asked to. As we spend Christmas at grandma's and New Year's at an aunt's ranch the "adults" are in charge of the food. I'm 25, so obviously I'm an adult. But I don't cook nearly as good as then, neither do my cousins and brother. So we help out with the cleaning since we don't really do any of the cooking! That being said, many don't really help with anything at all.
Ideally, the ones who don't cook should do the cleaning, but that's hardly how it ever goes down. Personally, I wash all my dishes right after I use them. I think that's the best way to avoid conflict. A lot of the older people in my family never even empty their plates, they just leave it their with scrapes in it. Do you know how disgusting it is to clear the chicken bones out of SOMEONE ELSE'S plate? It's pretty gross. Luckily, I only encounter that during the holidays, but it doesn't make it any less gross.
I don't help washing the dishes during the holidays because our hosts always have hired help to assist with cleaning. Also it helps that we don't use real plates anymore and instead we just use plastic ones so it would be easier to just wash or throw away. This way we don't accumulate too much of a mess so it's not a burden on the hosts or the guests.
I do believe that cleaning must be done very well by all the people who have taken part in the celebrations. It must not be given to only one or two people only because they are part of the family members. I believe that cleaning is a tedious work and everyone must have their part in it.
I think during the holiday, there should really be distributions of work like the ones who cook should no longer wash the dishes. Other members of the house who have not contributed that same great amount of effort or work should be the one doing the jobs that are still left unoccupied. Equality for all!
In all fairness the guests should not be expected to help and clean up but if they offer that's great. I always clean up after any kind of gathering that our family has and sometimes I have help and sometimes I don't. If I was at someone else's home depending on how well I know them I wouldn't offer to help clean because they may have a certain way of doing things. I would say that it was unfair that those that were originally given KP duty got to leave.
I like the thought that everyone should pitch in. But in reality, I'm (mom) always the one doing the dishes. And we do not have a dishwasher.
In this house I am the one always doing the dishes because I hate to see them sitting there dirty. I do get a little tired of everyone else acting like they don't see the dirty dishes because I also do the cooking. I have teenage grandsons that I feel should help with the dishes but it is so hard to get them to help I get tired of talking and do it myself.
Typically we spend the holidays with my family - the older women spend the day cooking and the younger kids get the pleasure of cleaning up afterwards. We think it is only fair.
