One of the reasons you give someone a gift is because you want to remind them that you value their friendship and that sort of thing. Since couples already know that, the money they could use to buy each other gifts could be used to get them something which they can both enjoy. Something like a romantic dinner once in a while, a weekend out of town . . . What do you guys think? Should couples save the money they'd have spent buying each other gifts so they can use it for other things?
I think couples spend on faaaaar more the rest of the year than on gifts for special occasions. I would suggest everyone look more at the things they feel they need and the wants they spend on before focusing on what they buy to celebrate a loved one. The cars, the houses, the brand name clothes, the expensive food, the gadgets and big electronics/appliances, eating out, entertainment, bigger, shinier, more more more. A gift is nothing compared to what people spend the entire year lol. On a limited budget though, every penny counts, so hopefully they're already thinking of crafty ways to gift.. if not, it's definitely an area to measure priorities. Showing love and appreciation doesn't have to require spending at all really. We all do it though, so again, everything comes down to how we spend in general.
It's no secret that I'm not keen on gift receiving, giving or shopping and to my relief, the OH has agreed that rather than buy each other gifts this Christmas, we'll just go halves on an Xbox One instead. It's long overdue and if I want one and he wants one, why make extra work for ourselves? We'll get a bundle deal and will take the old console to the gaming exchange to swap for a few more games.
I agree with this somewhat but I don't think it's something all couples could get into. Some might prefer giving each other gifts since it's still more personal, but like I said I agree that it's more practical to just combine the cost into something you both can enjoy together. Another alternative could also be is to just agree to get each other inexpensive and small gifts as tokens and the bulk of the budget goes into a vacation or a larger item for both.
I like the idea of buying something both can enjoy. We have a Nintendo Wii U but we share it as a family. Maybe something like this can work for couples as well. Though when it comes to certain days like birthdays I would leave this to a couple to decide. On days like this I might get something more tailored to the other person. Of course you have to keep I'm mind certain things like budgets, ect.
I think for the most part, money should be used to benefit both people. I have a rule for myself, which is that I try to only give gifts that are going to be meaningful. Giving a gift just because "it's expected" is something I don't like to be a part of, whether giving or receiving. I want to give someone a gift that I know they will love, whether it's handmade or it's something really expensive. If you have the money to get them something expensive that they will love, then absolutely do it. Making them happy is worth the cost. But dinner is great too! A few years ago during the holidays, a good friend of mine bought me some really thoughtful gifts, but she knew I was strapped for cash and couldn't afford to get her anything in return. She picked up on it and insisted that I didn't buy her anything, and that was a really sweet gift. Gift giving shouldn't necessarily be about money, it should just be a thoughtful gesture.
I don't agree with not giving gifts to the spouse. I actually expect a gift from my husband for my birthday. Last October when we were in Hongkong, my husband brought me to a shop where there are bags and shoes. I bought a bag that was on sale so I had brought home 2 handbags as a result. For this Christmas, I am expecting something from my husband that is wrapped. And it better be good, hahahaaah.
My husband and I actually to do both. We both like to get each other spontaneous gifts here and there, mainly little token gifts because we both enjoy getting the gifts as much as receiving them. We get each other chocolate, perfume, gift vouchers; and it's not always on any special day. But on the whole, we tend to get stuff that we can both enjoy and do together, like a little weekend break somewhere secluded or eating out. I guess it depends on the couple and their tastes and preferences.
My husband and I rarely spend money on ourselves throughout the year, therefore around Christmas we tend to splurge a little bit on each other. I buy him things that I know he could use or that he has been wanting for a while, but they are items that he would not buy for himself. My husband does the same for me. Sometimes we will take each other out shopping as our gift to each other and splurge a little bit on each other, this usually happens once or twice per year. We do not buy each other anniversary gifts, however. Usually we get each other a card and we will spend an evening out to dinner or something to celebrate.
I don't get mad when my boyfriend doesn't give me a gift and I don't demand them, but they are nice when he does get me something. It does make me feel appreciated. I think when we are 10+ years into our relationship then gifts wont matter as much to me.
I think that people should do whatever they want. People show each other appreciation to one another in numerous different ways. If people want to buy expensive gifts tailored to their partner's tastes, then why not. If they don't, and the partners didn't mind, then so be it. To each their own.
I think it depends on different couples. For instance, my husband and I, used to give gifts to each other when we were just boyfriend and girlfriend. But when we married and had a son, priorities changed. So gift giving is not at the top of the list now, baby comes first. So whatever our son needs, we buy that first. And most of the time, his needs are just equal to my salary plus his wants. My husband is studying still. So really, gift giving is not essential to us anymore.
Gift giving certainly can help show appreciation, and strengthen a relationship, it will make them happy so it's certainly a good thing. I can't see why you'd oppose this.
I have always sort of thought that when it comes to romance and stuff, you go all out. But maybe that is just the romantic in me, because many of the couples that I see in life, whether it be friends or family, don't really do anything for their partners when birthdays roll around. I am sure they do stuff that I don't see. But it doesn't appear to be a big thing or day - to celebrate that their love was born on that day lol. I am not saying that a lot of money has to be spent, but one can still make an effort.
For well off or "can afford" couples, buying gifts for each other plus going to somewhere to have fun or to dine is the norm, so I don't see anything wrong with that as long as they have the money. As for me I would prefer something tangible than something that's spent for leisure, so I would prefer just getting a gift than spend the money for leisure purposes.
I would also prefer something tangible. Something sentimental, and something that I could look at and remember the moment. Though if I go to a restaurant and the memories were great and romantic there, then I suppose that that is a somewhat tangible thing - the memories when I look at the establishment.
@DreekLass, You can just document the whole thing via your phone's camera, no need to go to the actual establishment just to reminisce, lol. Eating out is ok, but it's not required to do it that often.
In a relationship appreciation should always be shown. There are many ways to show appreciation, a small gift saying I appreciate you could be something like flower or even a quick call to say can I take you for a cup of coffee? Gifts do not have to be expensive. If a couple agree to not shop for each other and to take the money and get one big gift that they both will like is a good thing in my book.
True, but I was more meaning like if you just happened to be walking past the establishment, it'd be nice to have the memory. Hahaha!! It is definitely not something that is required, but it is just nice. I am more of a low key kind of person too. But if my partner wants to go out to eat, then I'll go if I feel up to it. I do like to smile my love though Not necessarily with expensive things, but that is not to say that I will not splash out
@DreekLass, I think you meant "spoil my love" instead of "smile my love", right? True, our loved ones deserve to be spoiled once in a while as long as we can afford it, so a gift plus some sort of get-together is the perfect way to celebrate special occasions.
